Sunday, December 10, 2006
Somethings bugging me..
Its nothing serious.
I dont know.. I feel kind of.. heavy.
Thats the best word I can think of to describe it, really. Lethargic, maybe? Apathetic? I have no idea. All i know is, something's bugging me. Its weighing me down.
Dont get me wrong. Im not depressed. Im not sad. In fact, im quite happy. Its just that somethimes, when im alone in the house, when i find myself doing the same things over and over again, i get to thinking..
There has to be something better that i should be doing, other that zonking out in front of one screen or another, or burrying my nose in books.
Ive fallen into a routine, and i cant stand it.
Get up, go to school, sit for three hours, try to stay awake, play pc games in between classes with my friends, go back to classes, try to stay awake, go home, sleep.
dont even get me started on my routine for days without class.
my only respite from the mind numbing monotony of it all are the stolen moments i have with trish. It is only during these times that I feel.
Seriously.
I numbly go about the whole day, trying to squeeze a semblance of MEANING out of this existance of mine. I feel like a freaking robot. But then again, when were together, all that junk gets thrown out the window and i feel as light as a feather. But then, my girl has to leave and FWOOP!! the darkness closes in on me all over again.
It is at its worst when im on my way home, and im trying to catch a ride. That is when i feel the most alone. I cant even text her cause its not safe whippin your phone out in public in this country. Its awfully frustrating standing in the street trying to catch an fx that seems to atually try to avoid you, while yearning for the softness of a pillow under my head.
I guess this just goes to show that that girl is the center of my life right now. God. That is a really scary thought, really. I dont know if thats romantic, or pathetic. Probably both. Well.. shes the single thing that makes me happy, thats for sure.. she's that light at the end of the tunnel that i find myself clinging to.. Gosh.. im such sap. Gotta get a grip.
Well.. whatever..
Que Cera Cera.
Out.
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--=| Life is
what you make it.|=--
Saturday, December 02, 2006
Its begining to look a lot like Christmas
It is the second day of December. Christmas is just a few weeks away.
I can almost here those sleigh bells ringing and jing ting tingaling too!
Who am i kidding? The closest thing to a sleigh here in this Gran ole' country of ours are the karitons. And those things are not pulled by any four legged creatures with antlers and 'a very shiny nose'. Well, most of the time. It would be quite a sight, though, i must admit.
Anyway, you know its nearing that time of year when you turn on the TV and get bumrushed by all the christmas movies.
I got to watch Home Alone 2 for the zillionth time this morning. Its funny how that movie never gets old.
Then, i got to watch Christmas With The Cranks, which was a suprisingly entertaining movie.
Then, my older brother burst through the door, saying. "I need to look mean! I need to look mean!"
I looked at him, and one sound came out of my mouth that said it all: "Huuuuhh?!"
Apparently, he and his boss were going to go to DAPITAN to look for some cheap Christmas Decorations for his office. He had some highly exaggerated thoughts about the danger of walking around in that street, especially while wearing business clothes. I laughed in his face then led him to dad's closet. I told him that Dapitan wasnt THAT dangerous, but he wouldnt believe me, saying "Taga dun si Boy Tusok!" What can i say? Aparently, weirdness is in our blood.
I grabbed him a white tee-shirt with the logo of the Talk and Text Phone Pals and sent him on his way. They even left their car and commuted there because they were afraid it would be too 'sosi'. Oi vey. It did, however, give my sister and me a nice big laugh. to think that we didnt see our brother for what.. like.. four months now? Yeah.. thats about right.
Anyway.. Soon. Christmas will be upon us. Well go crazy shopping for gifts, preparing for parties, singing christmas songs, and all the other assorted goodies that we do during the christmas season.
It is easy to forget that Christmas isnt all about all those things. It isnt the Money burning shoping spree that "the man" has turned it into. Im sure you all know the true meaning of christmas.
If you dont, then you might want to think about that.
Peace out! ^_^
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--=| Life is
what you make it.|=--
